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Why you CAN'T have it all - and that's ok




PART 1 = Women’s Equality – A brief (unofficial) History…


We all know the history books in regard to women’s rights – or lack of them. (well to be fair – I was always more of a Geography fan, so my Kings & Queens are sketchy, and my 8-year-old recently taught me a thing or two about the Romans but anyway…).


Thanks to Emmeline Pankhurst and crew, we, as women, get to grow up in a world in which we can vote, have an opinion, have jobs outside of them home. Well - that’s to say those of us fortunate enough to be living in a developed part of the world are.


I in no way mean to suggest that there is anywhere near equality across the board and do not want to disregard those women in parts of the world who are still essentially second-class citizens and very much subservient to the various men that surround and, in some cases, control them.


Neither do I wish to ignore the sometimes ‘elephant in the room’ when it comes to equality within the developed world. According to the National Centre for Domestic Violence, 1.7million women were victims of Domestic Violence last year and that’s just in the UK. In addition to this, the same source state that just 24% of Domestic Violence cases are reported.


I, however, have no lived experience of these backgrounds and therefore it doesn’t feel appropriate for me to pretend to know those worlds. Instead, if anyone reading this feels in a position in which they vulnerable or unsafe, for whatever reason – please see help.


There is a couple of links at the bottom, and I urge you also to remember two things always:

1.      YOU matter.

2.      Show yourself the same Kindness you do to others.

 

Who am I to comment?

Ok, this has all started on rather a serious note hasn’t it which has surprised me as much as you though as I type with my Nespresso & peanut butter on rye (how very middle class of me), this is what has flowed.


Before getting into why I fundamentally believe that we can’t ‘have it all’, I wanted to share a little bit about me, particularly why I come to find myself writing a piece about this very topic (and yes – my inner critic – ‘Gertrude’ is 100% telling me in a mocking tone “who are you to write an article?!? NO one will read it anyway!”).


I grew up in what I’d describe as a ‘typical’ 2.4 family. My Dad was the ‘bread winner’, mum didn’t go back to work until I was 9 and when she did, it was a term time, school day set-up so my younger sister and I were always taken and picked up from school.

I have vivid memories of getting home and we’d sit and have our after-school snack – mine chocolate buttons and ‘warm drink’ (lukewarm Robinsons Orange & Pineapple) and my sisters’, milky bar buttons and her ‘warm drink’ of choice, blackcurrant.


I don’t recall any specific conversations or thinking that these times were particularly momentous or special at the time though now, as I think about my own children – and how VERY different our set up is – I can’t help but feel nostalgic.

Aside from context, the reason I share this is that I wanted to paint a picture of then – before attempting to create a picture of now.


I must caveat that, again, I am writing this from my experience, my point of view. I am not suggesting this is ‘how things are’ though I hope, through sharing my experience, others can resonate and consider something different, a more fulfilling way.


Check out Part 2 'A day in the life of' to see if this resonates - I bet it does!

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